In your heart, how do you understand the word EQ?
Let me ask a question first. When you go to a place, how popular are you? In ordinary life, some people feel like spring breeze and feel close to each other no matter where they go, while some people feel embarrassing just by opening their mouth. , Retreat Sanshe.
In the final analysis, this is the topic we are talking about today: emotional intelligence. Real high emotional intelligence, in the final analysis, is a sense of proportion and control. People with high EQ can often know where they are in others’ hearts and how they feel in their hearts.
Within the necessary distance, they always know what they should do and how to do it. And this is real comfort.
High emotional intelligence lies in communication: “Emotional intelligence is a string of pearls, and communication is the brightest one; emotional intelligence is the fruit of a tree, and communication is the biggest one. If emotional intelligence is the fruit, then communication is the core, if emotional intelligence is the lake, then Communication is a fish. The so-called high emotional intelligence means that you understand and can communicate.”
To cultivate high emotional intelligence, you need to do 6 things:
Learn to listen
Listening is an art. Learning to listen, listening more and speaking less is a virtue. To be good at listening is to wait for others to finish talking. First listen to what the other person is saying, listen and think, and then speak from the other person’s point of view.
So their words are more likely to be welcomed by everyone. If you become a loyal listener of others, the other party will definitely feel that you are valued, and thus have a good impression of you and willing to associate with you.
Learn to control your emotions
If this is not possible, no matter how great the actual ability is, it will not help. Everyone has a variety of emotions, and smart people with high emotional intelligence can better manage and control bad emotions, transfer bad emotions cleverly, and don’t be emotional slaves.
People who are prone to fluctuating moods and easy to show up in emotions and anger are not so frank as they lack inner experience.
Being able to be calm at any time, behave rationally, restrain emotional impulse, restrain eager desires, keep oneself in a good mood, be cheerful, open-minded, is the performance of high EQ.
Learn to adjust your mindset
When you have the courage and responsibility to afford it, but also have the mind and wisdom to let go, it means that your emotional intelligence has been cultivated very high. Affordability is survival, and letting go is life; affording it is ability, and letting go is wisdom.
Emotions or fame is good. To be able to afford to let go, to afford it, is to care about others, let go, to complete oneself, this is the quality that a lofty businessman should have.
Pay attention to proportions
Zhou Guoping once said in “Man and Eternity”: “There is an unsurpassable final boundary in all interactions. Between these two people, this boundary is unclear, but it is definite. All troubles and conflicts arise unintentionally. I want to break through this boundary.”
What you can say, how much you can say, how to make the other person feel comfortable, the control of these problems reflects a person’s emotional intelligence. People with high EQ are well-measured in this regard and have their own bottom line. Proper measure is a measuring stick: if you are not proper, you will be negligent if you are too close, and you will be cold if you are too hot.
When you don’t deliberately embarrass others in front of people and know how to get along with people just right, you have a high EQ measure.
Know how to refuse in time
Our culture emphasizes decency in doing things, taking into account the influence of one’s actions on others, as well as others’ perceptions of oneself. So it is often difficult to say “no”. In fact, sometimes, only by knowing how to refuse can life be brightened up suddenly. It takes courage to refuse, and people with high EQ know how to refuse in a timely manner.
Refusal is not indifference, but refusal of unreasonable requests and things that are not in your own part, and refusal to make yourself painful.
People with high EQ will use appropriate rejection methods to make their lives smooth and satisfied, and avoid grievances.
Know how to think for others
If you want to be a person with high EQ, you need to be sincere and consider others.
Seeing people’s hearts over time, you may not be able to see how good or bad a person is, but you can definitely see whether a person is selfish and whether he is good at thinking about others.
Many people have low emotional intelligence, because they can’t think about others, they are too focused on gains and losses, and they are always afraid of suffering. The highest EQ is not scheming, but kindness for the sake of others.
If you also want to make yourself high EQ, talkative, hold all work and social situations, and have a sweeter husband and wife relationship, then please learn these six aspects, and life will go on forever.