October 07, 2022

Know how to appreciate others, will enhance your social charm

It is human nature to listen to praise. Everyone likes positive stimulation rather than negative stimulation. If everyone is willing to appreciate others and praise others for their strengths in interpersonal communication, then interpersonal enjoyment will be greatly increased.

Benefits of praise:

When a psychiatrist was queuing to withdraw money at the bank, he saw an old man in front of him with a sad face. The psychiatrist thought to himself, I want to make him cheerful. So he lined up and looked for the old man’s strengths. Finally he saw that although the old man hunched back, he had beautiful hair. So when the old man came to the psychiatrist after finishing the work, the psychiatrist heartily He praised: “Sir, your hair is so beautiful!” The old man has always been proud of his beautiful hair. He was very happy to hear the compliment of the psychologist. He immediately became cheerful and straightened his waist. After thanking him, he hummed and walked away. Up. It can be seen that a simple compliment brings much benefit to others.

A female college student, she was distressed by the tense interpersonal relationship in the dormitory. In the dormitory, the students did not communicate with each other, and each was busy with their own affairs. They seemed to be wary of each other and it was difficult to talk intimately. The atmosphere in the dormitory was dull. She hoped to change this situation, but she did not know where to start. I told her: From now on, try to praise others and truly appreciate the strengths of others, such as: “You look great today!” “Your eyes are really bright!” “This dress is perfect for you!” etc. Wait. Soon after, she came to tell me that the atmosphere in the dormitory had completely changed. Everyone helped each other, cared about each other, talked and laughed when together, and was willing to go back to the dormitory after class, as if the dormitory had an invisible attraction.

The power of praise:

Being good at admiring others often makes a leader possess magical powers. If you say to your subordinates: “Everyone knows that you are very capable. Recently, the unit has a shortage of manpower, and there is something we hope to get your help.” In this way, your subordinates will definitely share the worries for you, even if one person does two people’s work. There will be no complaints at work.

In family life, learning to praise is especially important. People often talk sweetly before marriage, criticize and complain after marriage, thinking that getting married is like entering the safe of love. There is no need to waste their minds to please and praise each other. No wonder there is a saying that “marriage is the tomb of love”. In fact, after marriage, the wife needs the husband’s appreciation more, and the husband is more eager for his wife’s encouragement. Criticism is not only useless, but also counterproductive.

In the growth process of children, encouragement and praise are even more indispensable. “Xiaobao is so good, give the apple to the little brother” and the like are conducive to the socialization of children. “The son is awesome, and my father is proud of you.” “Mom believes that you have the ability to deal with conflicts with classmates.” These are very important for cultivating children’s self-confidence and self-reliance.

Praising others will make others happy, and the benign rewards of the praised will make us happy, thus forming a virtuous circle of interpersonal relationships.

Of course, praising others does not mean that you can be unscrupulous. The following two principles should be paid attention to:

One is sincere. Praise others should be sincere. The content of praise is the good qualities and characteristics that the other party does or will have. Don’t let others feel that you are insincere and have other intentions. If you praise a person with a short stature for being burly, I’m afraid there will be a situation of “flattering on the hoof”.

Second, the content of praise should be taken care of by the other party. Praising middle-aged women for their slender body and praising the elderly for their physical strength can easily cause good reactions, while praising children for their youthfulness and young people’s teeth are hard to have a positive effect.