The study of interpersonal relations occupies an important position in the study of emotional intelligence. Because EQ is the ability to control and distinguish the feelings and emotions of individuals and others, and use these abilities to guide individual thoughts and behaviors. Since it is necessary to control and distinguish the love of others, the management of interpersonal relationships, including social skills and communication skills, is essential.
In real life, some people have good interpersonal relationships and many friends; some people have bad interpersonal relationships and have few or no friends at all. The reason for this difference is most closely related to people’s acquired living habits and personality, except for a few innate influencing factors. People with poor interpersonal relationships mainly have the following typical mentalities: They think that they must make a good impression to win their respect and love, but they don’t know how to win the hearts of others. The more they want to please others, the more they feel. The gain is not worth the loss; think that others can perceive your thoughts, and think that shy and anxiety are undesirable emotions, so stay at home; fear that you will make a fool of yourself in public, and believe that if you become ugly, others will take your things as a joke; will not say No, and will not express anger. When conflicts with others, blindly accommodating and compromise, leaving people with a lack of self-confidence; thinking that others do not like the real you, once others find the real you, they will feel weak and incompetent , Nothing good; I feel that I have become the target of all people, and everyone is talking about you…
I believe many people with poor interpersonal relationships will feel the above mentality. So, how to overcome? Some well-known psychotherapists believe that behavioral therapy can solve these problems.
That is, one’s own anxiety and anxiety, as well as unsatisfactory intentions in interpersonal communication, this technique is a powerful antidote to overcome poor interpersonal relationships. As long as you have enough courage to expose yourself, admit or publicly express your shortcomings, you will establish good interpersonal relationships.
Fantasy afraid of technology
Some people worry that the use of self-disclosure technology will damage their reputation or be laughed at, making them even more despised. In fact, their view is unreasonable, but the reality is difficult to change them in a short time. This technique can be used at this time. The main task of fantasy fear technology is to perform role-playing. Ask a friend to play you, and you play the person who mocks others. Ask your friends to answer freely. The result of this is that you will increasingly find that your friends have nothing to laugh at, and you are very boring as a mocker. This kind of technology can make you gradually realize that “self-exposure” sometimes will not be ridiculed by others.
Humiliating attack technique
This is also an effective therapy to overcome poor interpersonal relationships. This method is to let people who suffer from interpersonal troubles directly face their worries in a bold way, such as directly exposing their weaknesses to everyone in public. The advantage of this is that you can clearly see how insignificant your anxiety is in the eyes of others, and you take it so seriously.
It should be admitted that poor interpersonal relationships, except those caused by personality, are mostly caused by double distrust. The way to overcome and get rid of is to improve your relationship with others with practical actions. In social situations, people must learn to face their various emotions. When you first start to use the methods mentioned above, you may cause anxiety or even panic, but as long as you persevere, you can learn to express your emotions and your confidence will increase. Eventually, you will find that the weakness of poor interpersonal relationships is not so difficult to overcome. And transgressed.