February 26, 2021

The best relationship is that I owe you a little bit

01

There was a question that asked, what is the best way to chase someone?

The best answer is: ask him/her to borrow money.

When borrowing money, you can honestly talk to the goddess/male god, and when you pay back the money, you can also invite the goddess/male god to eat. If you are late, the goddess/male god will always think of you There is so much sense of existence.

The bridge between the benefactor and the enemy will often say such a sentence: From now on, we will cut off justice and owe each other.



It can be seen that if you want to break off friendship with a person, the most important thing is not to owe each other to him.

The most basic view of the arrangement of the family system is that in order to maintain a good relationship between people, there must be a basic balance between effort and harvest.

But if you owe a little bit to others, is there an imbalance between the pay and the gain? As everyone knows, the balance here is an ultimate goal, a dynamic balance, not a balance all the time. It is this slight imbalance that drives the flow of relationships.

02

When a person just accepts in a relationship and cannot repay, or no matter how he repays, he cannot make his return equal to the other’s contribution, he will have a huge sense of guilt and incompetence in his heart. Because giving can bring a sense of accomplishment and existence, when a person’s giving is always surpassed by the other party, he will feel that he is very useless and the other party does not need himself at all. This is a very bad feeling, and it will make people want to escape from this relationship to relieve their huge psychological pressure.

Therefore, if you pay blindly without asking for anything in return, the other party will leave you sooner or later. Because good people let you do it all, it seems that the other person is bad, and no one likes how bad they feel.

Therefore, the best way to get along between husband and wife is not to pay blindly, do not ask for return, and accept it when the other party returns. Let the other party be a good person. The other party will not be unhappy, but will appreciate your acceptance and Sure, why not do it?



The same is true between friends. You help me a little bit today, and I will help you a little bit tomorrow, so that you don’t see the outside world, and you really treat each other as a friend. If you are afraid of owing favors to others and are unwilling to ask for help, then there is a lack of flow of affection between you. Affection is used to owe it, and then it can be paid back. If you don’t owe it at all, you can only get more and more productive, and finally become a stranger. The best relationship is to owe you a little bit, so that we can constantly swing between owing and paying off, and achieve a dynamic balance of emotions between people. This is the most relaxed and lasting mode of getting along.

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